Tuesday, December 7, 2010

A Visit From Nomad Boy

I know you are all waiting for an update on my weekend with Nomad Boy.

I wish that I could give you a hot and steamy update and tell you that the International Woman of Mystery and Nomad Boy are totally meant to be! I wish I could tell you that it was the most awesome weekend of my life and that I can't wait to see him again.

Unfortunately... the only thing I can say about this weekend is that it was a border-line disaster. Nomad Boy and I just weren't on the same page at all. He has not really matured or progressed since the last time we saw each other. I hate to say it, but he's kind of a loser with no job, no money, and a whole lot of bad luck following him around. And while he might still be beautiful and a bit mysterious and in some moments, he still makes my heart flutter like it did when I was a teenager, I'm way to old and practical for a guy like that.

To summarize - it was DISAPPOINTING - to say the least. On my way home from dropping him off, I called  I'm attractive single friend C for a bitch session and for the first time in my life bemoaned the fact that unfortunately, I'm not attracted to women because that is how DONE I feel with men right now. This disappointment stacked on top of another one that I'm not ready to blog about has done me in. I am DONE WITH MEN!

I don't want to drag you through all the gory details nor do I want to virtually re-live the weekend (I already feel sad that it's one weekend that I will never get back).

But to give you some insight into what went down, I will leave you with the following list:

Dear Nomad Boy - here is what NOT TO DO when visiting any hot girl that you haven't seen in years:
  • Do not not have a phone - it's just annoying and makes meeting up with you and coordinating things that much more frustrating
  • Do not not have a winter jacket. Seriously. Especially if you grew up in New England - it's December in Boston - it's freaking cold. You should know that.
  • Do not tell me that we should do fun things like go ice skating and walk around Boston and get me all excited as those are exactly the things that I want to do and then get here and decide it's too cold to leave the apartment (well, of course it's cold if you don't have a winter jacket).
  • Do not sit around like a total stoner all weekend watching mindless You Tube videos and smoking and trying to get me interested in what you are watching. I might humor you but it's not how I really want to spend my time.
  • Do not criticize Boston and tell me that you could NEVER live there - especially after I have expressed to you that I'm feeling a bit freaked out about having just moved back.
  • Do not keep turning up my heat as high as it can go every time I turn around - I have to pay for that shit! Some of us have adult lives with adult responsibilities and bills...
  • Do not let me pay for the bill every time and then call me "Sugar Mama."
  • Do not wake up at 7:00 in the morning (after going to bed at 4) and try to convince me to have sex with you (when I'm obviously not feeling it) and then keep me awake. Seriously. I have a job and I need to sleep on the weekends! 3 hours sleep is totally not sufficient and it throws me off for the rest of the week!
  • Do not pick random fights with me in the bar just to pick a fight
  • Do not purposefully try to make me feel bad by criticizing me about little things such as being with one company for 10 years and implying that this makes me less attractive on the job market when you do not even have a job at a all!
  • Do not pick fights with me about topics involving my line of work and then tell me that there is no way that I can  possibly know more on the subject than you even though you have no way to back up your argument.
  • Do not instigate drama in any way - why would you do that? Who wants to fight?  Not me!
  • Do not talk about all the bad relationships you've had in the past (although the inevitable drama and fighting parts of the story were at least insightful and made me realize that this is probably a pattern with you and probably has very little to do with me).
  • Do not tell me that I'm acting weird and "psychotic" when I'm being quiet because I'm upset at the way you are treating me and I'm secretly wishing you would leave. I'm sorry that I chose to be quiet rather than to fight back and engage you in a fight. Fighting with you just seemed pointless and worthless. You just weren't worth it to me. I decided to endure and be rid of you rather than fight back.
  • Do not make me drive you to Worcester to meet your father who you have also made drive to Worcester from W. Mass to get you - there is a perfectly fine bus going between here in W. Mass. I have taken it many times. For someone who has no money and no job... I don't think you should feel that you are so above that.
  • If I do decide to give up most of my Sunday evening and drive you to Worcester, do not criticize my driving and generally be mean to me during the car ride
  • If I do decide to drive you to Worcester, do not forget the address of where we are supposed to meet your father, and if you do forget it, do not get mad with me for not being able to find the place (especially when you had never told me the address in the first place)
  • And after all that, do not jump out of the car and forget to thank me after I drive you all the way to Worcester (a 2 hour and 45 minute trip since I spent forever driving around in Worcester trying to find the place and another 30 minutes trying to find parking when I got back to Boston).
Unfortunately, that is the list. All those things really happened. And that list probably doesn't even scratch the surface... I'm blocking out everything else out. Clearly he is self centered, selfish and lacks any kind of manners... My biggest regret is now my beautiful memories of him will be tainted by this horrible weekend.

Despite feeling a bit beaten up by men... I'm trying to look on the bright side. Look forward rather than backwards.

I have a new work friend - super sexy A and she has promised to finally introduce me to some Boston nightlife/men this weekend. I can't wait! It will truly be my first weekend in Boston where I don't have tons of commitments. I can't wait to get out and explore the city, do some shopping, check out the Christmas lights etc. Ok in reality, we might be doing more checking out the Boston nightlife than anything else which means I might be hiding out in my bed hungover during the day. But even that would be an improvement over last weekend with Nomad Boy!

So, while I feel like I'm done with men... I guess I'm not totally ready to give up yet. Let's see what the weekend has in store.


Average Girl said...

Uggghhh girl, you are way too nice for your own good. I would have taken his sorry ass the first night and dumped him at any old bus stop and said arrivederci freakazoid and never looked back! Happy to come down there any time and whoop his ass for you! :)



Anonymous said...

Oh wow. Just, wow. Who does that kind of stuff!? What a nightmare. It is for exactly that reason that I sometimes just let past flames stay there and refuse to take that leap into romantic...because I'm scared to shatter the awesome fantasy relationship we have in my head with reality.
I am glad you haven't completely given up on men...though I don't blame you for being frustrated.
Have a great weekend coming up...can't wait to hear all about it.

Marcela said...

Ughhh. But let's look at the positive side: you will not find yourself wondering in the future if maybe he could have been the one or comparing future relationships to an idealized version of him. The king is dead, long live the King. The Right guy is out there, somewhere. You'll find each other.
Have a nice week!

Matt79 said...

I saw the blog post title and thought "Oh yeah!", then saw the photo and thought "Oh no." What a list - a quarter of that would have been bad enough! I hope your new friend A guides you to some great Boston men this weekend who can help you put last weekend out of your mind.

jules said...

I LOATH when people want to show you 18 million youtube videos! I can't believe he was so rude to you and did not bring a coat to flipping Boston! Good for you for not engaging in his stupid arguments! Better things to come!

Lifebeginsat30ty said...

You know, I'm going to be positive about this. This is a good thing. You had this idealized version of him from the past, a fantasy in your head of what could have happened. The ideal version would have been a wonderful weekend that leads to you getting married. If not, the next best thing is for him to be an ass! Cause then you can move on and find Mr Awesome.

And I'm going to only this: FUCK HIM. That is some rude shit! ;)

International Woman of Mystery said...

Thanks everyone for the nice comments! I'm glad it's behind me... Now, I'm moving on. Although still feeling a bit disilusioned with men! Ugh,

Sara Louise said...

BUMMER! Huge huge bummer! But on the positive side (because I'm in a glass half full kind of mood) instead of spending the rest of your life wondering about Nomad Boy and harboring a simmering crush, now you know! Moving on! xo

Anonymous said...

Oh my good what a shithead!!!
Hopefully your next date will be a real gentlemen and actually afford to pay for the dinner!!!
You do deserve much much more!!!

Big hugs
Magie from the cold and white Stockholm